Reflections -- On My Way Out

This is my last official post for “Mary’s World,” a blog that I created as part of the requirements for my graduate English course in Creativity and Community at IPFW.  When first given the assignment my initial reaction was, “What am I going to write about?”  But, as it turns out, I managed to come up with ten topics to address in Mary’s World, and I thought I would provide updates here on some of those topics.

“My Destined Path,” my first blog post, was revisited in a creativity paper I just completed for my class.  I found these writings to be a part of a healing process I have undergone in the past three-plus years since leaving what I once considered as my “dream job.”  When I look back now, it doesn’t hurt so much and it all makes more sense.

“My Air Force Son,” Jonathan, has just returned to Hawaii after serving a six-month solitary deployment in the Philippines.  His family has not seen him since last September.  His wife and two young daughters have been staying with her parents here in Indiana and have kept in touch by “Skyping” on the computer.  That experience may have been the hardest on the baby, who just had her first birthday and doesn’t understand where Daddy went.  Every time she saw Daddy on the computer, she either held up her arms to him, in hopes that he would pick her up; or, she would look behind the monitor, thinking Daddy was hiding behind it.  Hopefully she won’t get too scared when she finally gets to see him in person once again – she was only seven months old when she last saw him.  My son is currently in Hawaii looking for a place for them to live during his final five months of his tour of duty there.  The Air Force refuses to provide military housing because of the short time left, and he is having a difficult time finding civilian housing, as many Japanese people have relocated to Hawaii after being displaced by the recent earthquake and tsunami disaster in their homeland.  Hopefully, Jon will find a decent place that doesn’t cost him all the money he saved by having his wife and daughters stay with family.

“A Family of Overachievers?” has another member who is retiring.  My sister Barbara, who works for Boston University, will be leaving her position this spring.  She says she is burned out and ready for retirement – or at least ready to be away from her current position, which has become extremely stressful.

“On Veterans, the Military & The Warrior Writers” is wrapping up.  This post refers to the Warrior Writers Project that I am working on for a final class project with two of my classmates, Rebecca Roady and Adrian Rivera.   We have received a few submissions, writing workshops are planned, and I will soon be extremely busy putting the pages of the book together so we can turn it in to our professor.  It has been harder than expected to get people to participate, but I am confident we have enough contributors to make it worthwhile.  The final anthology will be well worth our efforts!

 “The Paper Shuffle: Stackers, Sorters & Shufflers” is a timely topic to return to.  With all of the late-semester assignments and papers I have been working on for my graduate-level classes, the desk in my home office has quite an assortment of stacks.  When I’m looking for a particular piece of paper, I kind of resemble that lady frantically climbing up the stack of papers in the artwork I included with my original post.

As a final note, even though I often dreaded having to write these blog posts, in looking back I realize it has been fun as well as therapeutic.  Thank you, Dr. Cain, for the opportunity to grow and reflect!

Expanding My Role at the SBDC

I recently accepted a full-time position with the Northeast Indiana Small Business Development Center (NEISBDC), where I formerly worked part time as marketing coordinator.  The move was made for a variety of reasons, including a higher paycheck, full benefits (I have not had any health insurance nor paid time off for more than three years), and growth opportunities.

Financial analysis is a component of a business plan and
is needed in order for a company to get funding.

To transition to my full-time position, which includes business counseling as an added responsibility, I have been studying materials in a Business Advisor’s Notebook to become more thoroughly educated on business plans, market analysis, financial projections and other skills so that I have the expertise needed to assist entrepreneurs and business owners with starting or growing their business.  Last semester, I also took business courses in accounting and economics at IPFW in anticipation of this career move, and completed training in the SPIN sales process that we use as a tool in analyzing our clients’ needs.

In addition, I recently traveled to Indianapolis to attend business counselor training with some of my colleagues from around the state who also work for the Indiana Small Business Development Center network.  It was an interesting experience that helped me increase my understanding and comfort level so that I can be more confident when dealing with a variety of unique situations that we encounter while working with business clients.  It was also fun to meet professionals from the other centers who are glad to serve as mentors for someone like me who is fairly new to business counseling.

As part of our activities, we studied various test cases that were representative of actual cases that had been handled by Small Business Development Centers.  This experience helped us hone our business analysis skills to get to the bottom of the situation so we can better assess how to provide assistance.  Sometimes when a client comes to us, we uncover a certain problem that ends up being totally unrelated to the reason they made the appointment.  That’s where the SPIN skills come in handy, allowing us to assess the Situation, Problem, Implication and Need of the client and develop an action plan to take care of their needs.

Role playing was a big part of the recent training at the Indiana Small Business Development Center headquarters in Indianapolis.  The participants were divided up and partnered with someone else of their own skill level, and a third person served as an observer to critique our presentation skills.  Half the time I played the role of the client, and the rest of the time I served as the business advisor.  It was a lot more fun being the client, but the learning experience really came when I played the role of a business advisor, rehearsing how to ask the right questions so that the client and I can both get to the heart of the situation.  While I started out being really nervous in this situation, by the end of the training I was pretty confident, and I came back to Fort Wayne ready to use my newly-refined skills with the variety of clients that I serve.

One of the first projects I tackled with my new training tools was the review of a business plan.  Having just completed the related training, I was able to look at the plan with a keenly critical eye, pointing out missing sections, incomplete information and numbers in the plan that did not match up with those in their financial statements, along with information that we business advisors call “fluff.”  A lot of times clients include statements in their business plans that are just assumptions lacking the needed statistics to make them credible.  We must point these weak areas out so the client can do the needed research and make their plans substantive enough to meet the requirements of the banks or other lending institutions where they are seeking funding for their business.

I look forward to continued learning and growth opportunities as I move forward with my work at the Northeast Indiana Small Business Development Center and help entrepreneurs make their dreams come true.

'Serving the Children of the World' through Kiwanis

A few years ago, a good friend of mine talked me into going with him to a Kiwanis Club meeting.  “Kiwanis – I thought that was a men’s organization?” was my reply.  He explained that originally it was a men’s organization – in fact, when it was founded in Detroit in 1915 by Allen Simpson Browne, it was called the Benevolent Order of Brothers.  A decision was later made to change the name to “Kiwanis,” an American Indian term meaning “We make ourselves known.”  The club’s founder agreed Kiwanis was an appropriate name, because he hoped the organization would provide better business opportunities for its members to make themselves known.

Somewhere over the years, the focus changed from being a business organization to becoming a community service group with a mission of “Serving the Children of the World.”  The club’s headquarters were moved from Detroit to Indianapolis, and Kiwanis spread throughout the United States and into other countries, becoming an international organization.  Eventually, women were welcomed into Kiwanis and have since become some of the most active members of the organization.

Mr. and Mrs. Johnny Appleseed at a Kiwanis activity.

My visit to a Kiwanis meeting grew into my becoming a member.  My membership grew into becoming a club secretary.  Within my first year of service, the club secretarial position grew into becoming a co-chair of the Indiana District Convention, responsible for planning, organizing and hosting the statewide convention in 2008; and from there I became a member of the District’s Public Relations Committee, traveling to Indianapolis to attend meetings to strategize on ways to promote Kiwanis.  In between leadership stints, I flipped hamburgers while working at a food booth at the 4-H Fair, sold barbecued duck sandwiches and buffalo jerky at the Johnny Appleseed Festival while dressed as Mrs. Appleseed, helped with a bike rodeo to teach bicycle safety tips to local children and encourage them to wear helmets while out and about on their bikes, and hosted a roller skating party for participants of Big Brothers Big Sisters.

I also took a tour of Riley Hospital for Children, one of the main beneficiaries of Kiwanis fundraising, and visited the mobile neonatal intensive care unit (NICU) that Kiwanis funded and furnished to help safely transport medically-fragile children to the hospital.  I have organized and hosted Governor’s Dinners, helped found a new club, led meetings as Club President and organized fundraisers to benefit local charities.

Our most recent fundraising activity is the making and selling of chocolate-covered, peanut butter cream Easter eggs.  As a result of two weekend production lines, members of my club, the Northwest Summit City Kiwanis, will have made more than 1,000 chocolate egg halves this month to raise money for our newest venture, the sponsorship of the Fort Wayne area’s first-ever Aktion Club.

We are partnering with Easter Seals Arc of Northeast Indiana to organize this Aktion Club, which is a community service organization that is specially designed for those with special needs.  All members will be adults with disabilities, and they will elect officers, run their own meetings, and conduct their own fundraisers and community service activities, just like a regular Kiwanis Club.

The first organizational meeting will be April 6, and the club will be chartered as soon as a few dozen potential members are secured.  The Northwest Summit City Kiwanis will use the money raised through the Easter egg sales to fund the new club, providing free one-year memberships to all those interested in becoming a part of the Aktion Club. There is a lot of excitement building about this new club because adults with disabilities have limited opportunities for social interaction and community service.  It will be interesting to see how it all turns out, and I am excited by the possibilities.

In the meantime, I am selling packages of five peanut butter/chocolate egg halves for $5 each to raise the money needed to get this Aktion Club up and running.  Want to buy a pack and help a good cause?

Coming Home to the Home Show

Last week, my family and I decided to brave the crowds and go to the Fort Wayne Home & Garden Show.  While I don’t have any spare money to spend on home remodeling right now, I think it’s fun to occasionally go to the show to get some home improvement ideas to dream about and work toward.

Working in the promotional marketing field, one of the things I focused on, in addition to looking at all the home improvement ideas and visiting with the various acquaintances I ran into, was the type of marketing techniques the various companies used to get you to stop by their booth or come and talk to them.

Of course, there are a couple of well-known techniques that always get a draw.  One of them is to have a drawing for a popular object (a free iPad and gift certificates for remodeling projects were some of the items available), and to have people stop by and fill out an entry form.  Of course, there are blanks for your telephone number, email address and home mailing address, in addition to your name – so it makes it easier for these companies to contact you after the show to try to sell their services.

Windows, Doors & More had a well-refined strategy.  They had an extensive welcome booth at the entrance to the show where you were instructed to fill out your entry form for their drawing, then you were given a coupon to take to their booth on the show floor for a chance to “spin the wheel” on their wheel of fortune and win a prize.  Needless to say, there was a long line of people waiting to win their prize, which ranged from a free candy bar to restaurant gift certificates or a free pizza from a local pizza shop.  It was not unusual for the lady assisting the spinners to stop the wheel mid-spin to try to help you win what she thought you might like.  Since we had a couple of young children with us, she helped us win a couple of candy bars for them.  Windows, Doors & More also had a number of elaborate displays – not only of windows and doors, but also kitchen cabinets, roofing, and a variety of other home improvement services that they offer.

Speaking of candy, that was also a big draw to get people into your booth.  The kids were not afraid to go up to each booth that had a candy jar; and, after making all the rounds, they had a bag filled with loot similar to what they get on Halloween.  Another way to keep the kids happy was to have a separate room for children’s activities.  A martial arts studio had head bands the kids could decorate and wear around their heads to advertise their business; kids’ birthday party entertainers had face painting and balloon sculptures available for a “tip;” and there was a petting zoo offered by another business.

Another attraction for both kids and adults was a flying bat that flew in circles over the Critter Control booth, and they added a candy dish to entice you to stop by and check out their services.  Chocolate candy makers were also giving out free samples to entice you into buying their candy.

A health studio was offering free massages for adults using a specially-designed massage chair.  Other draws were an antique Model T Ford, free trinkets, pens or pencils, and of course free literature for any type of service imaginable – from concrete to landscaping and storage barns, in addition to windows, doors and more . . .

The Paper Shuffle: Stackers, Sorters, and Stuffers

Fridays are good days for getting your desk organized at the office so it will be in order for the next week’s paper shuffle.  In preparation for Friday, I went to Office Depot and bought some tools with which to organize my desk.  I bought two stacking trays, a descending file folder holder, a phone tray, and a three-tiered organizer.  I am determined to get my desk organized once and for all!

I have observed, while working in an office environment for more than 20 years, that there are basically three types of paper shufflers.  Each type has its own unique way of handling paperwork, and it’s virtually impossible to break them of their habits.  Below is a discussion of the three main types of paper shufflers, but it should be noted that some people are a combination of one or more of the stereotypes described here.  Which type are you?

The Paper Stacker

The Paper Stacker is overwhelmed with the amount of paperwork that seems to accumulate on her desk (for purposes of this discussion, I am going to refer to all of these paper shufflers as “she” and “her” – with no slight intended to the males reading this blog).  A Stacker observes that she no sooner gets one stack of papers filed away before another stack mysteriously appears on her desk.  It’s like the stacks of papers reproduce overnight!

The Paper Stacker is likely to open whatever mail she receives through “snail mail” and put it in a stack to sort later.  She is also likely to open her e-mails and print off copies of the most important ones to serve as reminders of things “to do.”  That’s how the first two stacks are formed.  She puts each stack of papers in a separate file folder to keep them “organized,” and writes a description on the file folder tab to remind her what’s in each folder.

The Stacker typically is a multi-tasker.  She has several projects going on at the same time, and finds it difficult to quickly bring any of them to completion.  A file folder is made for each project when it arrives.  She’ll work on that project to get it started, but then turn her attention to another project that is more pressing.  She’ll work on that third project until she runs into a roadblock, then sets it aside to focus her attention on yet another project.

With a Paper Stacker, folders are put away in a file cabinet only upon completion of the project.  In the meantime, the folders are neatly stacked on her desk.  There’s one stack for the most pressing projects, another one for long-term assignments, and yet another for the administrative paperwork that comes with each office position.  Oh, and there’s likely to be a folder called “Miscellaneous,” for all the stuff that she really doesn’t know what to do with, but doesn’t want to throw away.

You see, Stackers tend to be pack-rats, and to many office observers, they appear to be totally disorganized.  However, The Stacker is, in fact, very organized in her own way.  If someone were to pop into her office unexpectedly, looking for information on a particular project, it’s likely that she’ll know exactly which stack that project is in and can obtain the requested information on a moment’s notice.  But, nonetheless, she drives her antithesis, The Paper Sorter, literally crazy!

The Paper Sorter

The Paper Sorter is the ultimate organizer, and she is likely to be labeled as an “OCD” case by her Stacker friends.  She has one neat little file holder on her desk, along with one tray or inbox.  Both of them are labeled with their contents, and everything is in order.

The Sorter cannot stand disarray of any sort.  She likes to keep her desktop cleared off, and at the end of the day she even removes her file holder and inbox and puts them inside her desk or file cabinet.  She is likely to dust off her desk on a daily basis, and frequently wipes off her computer monitor, “power washes” her keyboard with anti-dust spray and disinfects her phone -- as she cannot stand dirt, dust or germs!



The Neat Desk -- with Everything in its Place.
Does Anyone Really Work Here?



And if by chance someone were to lay a folder or other extraneous object on her desk, she would have to whisk it away immediately and put it in its proper place, as she gets claustrophobic when she has anything surrounding her other than the project of the moment.  Oh, and by the way, unlike her Stacker friends, she likes to work on one project at a time and get it done before moving on to her next assignment, and may get upset if someone interrupts her while she is deeply ensconced in her work.

The Sorter will sort through her mail as soon as it arrives, and immediately toss out anything she doesn’t want to keep.  For the mail that she does keep, she files it neatly away into the proper folder, which she subsequently moves into the file cabinet.

As for printing documents off the computer, the Sorter sees that as a waste of time.  She methodically sorts and moves documents around on her computer desktop to the appropriate folder, likes to read documents on the computer screen, and often scans important papers so she can throw away as much paper as possible and minimize mess.  For those papers she does keep, however, they are neatly filed away immediately into her file cabinet, which is organized not only by labels, but coordinated by colors for each file category.  The Sorter is extremely proud of her organizational skills and is disgusted by what she views as the messy offices of her Stacker friends.

The Paper Stuffer

The desk of the Paper Stuffer often appears as neat as that of the Paper Sorter.  While there may be a few folders or objects on her desk during the day, she has been known to clear off her desk before leaving for the day, to give her boss the appearance of being productive and organized.

However, the Stuffer is a Stacker in disguise, only much less organized.  She will stack up papers without putting them in a file folder, and then stuff all the paper stacks into her desk or credenza before going home.  When the stacks become too big to fit into the desk, she is likely to just grab some of them and throw them away without considering what important papers might be hidden within.  Or, she might forget where she stuffed a particular stack – was it her desk, file cabinet, credenza or storage unit?  “Oh well, it’ll turn up sooner or later,” she thinks to herself.

The Stuffer is likely the least responsible and least productive of the three types of Paper Shufflers, which oftentimes is a symptom of a poor work ethic.  I remember my boss clearing out the desk of a Stuffer who had just been terminated due to poor attendance and poor performance.  My boss found an assortment of unopened envelopes containing checks written to the company that had never been recorded nor deposited months after they were postmarked!

The Stacker, the Sorter, or the Stuffer?

So, which type of Paper Shuffler am I?  Can you guess?  That’s right, I’m a chronic Stacker . . . but I just bought some shiny new desk organizers that will help me get organized once and for all!  Don’t place any bets on it, however; as they say, “Old habits die hard,” and it will be hard to refrain from stacking for any significant length of time.  Wish me luck!

On Veterans, the Military and the Warrior Writers

If someone had told me just a few months ago that I would be attending a Veterans Recognition Breakfast, I would have thought he or she was crazy.  First of all, I am not a veteran and, in fact, until my son joined the military I actually had an aversion to all things military.  This aversion goes back to the era in which I grew up.  I was at the tail-end of the Vietnam War era – an era known for its anti-war sentiments and its popular saying that you should “Make Love, Not War.”  I have to admit that I still am a bit of a pacifist and I don’t like war – I think it should be avoided at all cost unless it is in direct defense of our country.  However, now that my son is in the military, I realize that although I may not support what some higher-ups in the U.S. Government have sent our military overseas to do, we must stand by our men and women who are fulfilling their orders as part of the oath they took to defend our country.

When I recently had the opportunity to become a part of a project called Warrior Writers Fort Wayne, I decided to take the plunge because it sounded like a worthy endeavor.  I checked out the national Web site to see what the Warrior Writers were all about, and I found it to be an outlet where individuals in the military could express themselves and comment freely on their military experience and its effect on them and their families -- good and bad.  These are young men and women who are dedicating their lives to service in the military, just like my son.  I became hooked.

My project partners, Air Force veteran Becky Roady (leader of the project) and classmate A.J. Rivera, have been collaborating with me on ways we can get military people and veterans involved in the Warrior Writers.  Becky attended a movie night on the campus of our college, Indiana University-Purdue University Fort Wayne (IPFW), to become connected with IPFW students who are in the military and hopefully get them engaged.

We are looking for a place to conduct writing workshops for our project, and I decided to check out the Red Cross, which is known for its assistance to veterans and those in the military.  So, I called up the Red Cross and talked to one of the people in charge of their military and veterans programs.  It just happened that they were having a Veterans Recognition Breakfast that same weekend, and she invited me (and another one of my project partners) to attend.  It turned out that I went alone to the breakfast, and I didn’t know what to expect.

As I arrived at the Red Cross breakfast check-in table, they asked me what branch of military service I was affiliated with – they had distinct name tags for the Army, Navy, Air Force, Marines, etc. – and I had to tell them I was not a veteran, just a guest.  “I do have a son in the military, though,” I said, trying to justify my attendance at the veterans’ breakfast, “and I’m involved in a project for veterans.”

I went in and took a seat at a nearly-empty table, not knowing anyone in the room.  As I looked around, I saw one table in the middle occupied by a group of gray-haired people, both men and women.  Some were in uniforms, but most of them were in civilian clothing.  “Must be World War II vets,” I thought to myself.  At the other end of my table were a few guys who looked to be in my age bracket, maybe a bit older, and I heard them talking about Viet Nam, so it was easy to figure out from what era they were.  Then, there were just a couple of really young people in the room, and I speculated that perhaps they were still active military personnel – maybe even a part of the conflicts in Iraq or Afghanistan.

The breakfast started with the Pledge of Allegiance and a flag-folding ceremony.  It was during this ceremony that I learned most of the gray-haired people in the room were actually Korean War-era veterans.  I started doing the math and realized that probably a lot of the World War II veterans were no longer among us.

The Korean War veterans wore white gloves while handling the U.S. flag and explained that the red stripe of the flag was for life, the white stripe for eternal life, and there were 13 stripes to signify the 13 founding colonies of the union.  The blue stars represent the 50 states of the union, and they even pointed out which star represented our home state of Indiana – the 20^th star, signifying that it was the 20^th state to join the union.  As the vets began carefully folding the flag, they explained the significance of each fold – I cannot remember now what each fold symbolized – but as a result of this ceremony, I came to appreciate the flag and what it represents to those who have defended it.  After the flag was completely folded up and tucked in to form a triangle shape, it was presented to the Red Cross for its display.

The Red Cross, in turn, presented an award to one of the Korean War veterans in recognition of his volunteer service to the organization.

At the end of the breakfast, I was given the opportunity to stand up and briefly tell about our Warrior Writers project and to encourage the veterans to participate.  As a result, four veterans expressed an interest in submitting their writings to the project.  One of them was a 98-year-old woman named Virginia who said she had some good poems she had written about her military service during World War II.  I was honored by her presence and excited about her interest in being a Warrior Writer.

I look forward to reading the submissions of all of our Warrior Writers from Fort Wayne and am proud to be a part of the project.  While I may not appreciate or approve of war unless it is in direct defense of our country, I can surely appreciate the stories and reflections of those who have served and cannot wait to share them with the world!

On the EDGE and the SBDC

Some of you may wonder what exactly I do most of the week, outside of going to school at IPFW.  One of the principle occupations of my time is the Northeast Indiana Small Business Development Center (NEISBDC), located in a little building called the IPFW Hobson Center at Hobson and Stellhorn Roads.  The NEISBDC is a nonprofit organization that is funded in part by the Small Business Administration.  It is an agency of the Indiana Economic Development Corporation’s SBDC network of nine regional centers located statewide whose mission is “to have a positive and measurable impact on the formation, growth, and sustainability of small businesses in Indiana and to develop a strong entrepreneurial community.”  The ISBDC mission is accomplished by offering one-on-one business counseling and a variety of resources free of charge, along with low-cost or no-cost workshops to help entrepreneurs with their business. The local center serves 10 counties in Northeast Indiana and is hosted by Indiana University-Purdue University Fort Wayne, receiving administrative support through the IPFW Division of Continuing Studies.

 As marketing coordinator for the center, I am responsible for marketing, public relations and communications for the Northeast Indiana SBDC.  Responsibilities include creating press releases, electronic newsletters, annual reports and success stories; maintaining a Facebook page; taking photographs and making videos of our clients; and special events coordination.  I also represent the center at local resource fairs and as a guest speaker when requested by area organizations.  As you can see, my position presents a lot of variety, on which I thrive!

I also work directly with NEISBDC clients on marketing strategies, plans and implementation. During the course of my interaction with small business owners, I often help them develop and design brochures, write sales letters, and do market and demographic research to assist them with writing their business plans.  I also conduct one-on-one training with clients from time to time, and am involved in award nominations for their businesses.

Various awards are available during the course of a year to recognize the success of local businesses – among them the Northeast Indiana Innovation Awards hosted by KPC Media Group here in Fort Wayne, as well as the Companies to Watch and EDGE Awards distributed by the Indiana SBDC network.  As part of our marketing and public relations strategies, the NEISBDC identifies and nominates area businesses for these awards, particularly businesses whose owners have worked with our center.

ABOUT ‘EDGE’
The most recent award nominations involving our center were for the 2011 EDGE Awards.  EDGE stands for Economic Development & Growth through Entrepreneurship, and the award recipients fall into two categories:  Emerging or Established businesses.  The recipients are all clients of the ISBDC network who have been chosen by the regional SBDC centers based on their business success.

This year, three clients of the NEISBDC were presented with 2011 EDGE Awards on February 9 at the Indiana State House in Indianapolis.  Indiana Lt. Gov. Becky Skillman was on hand to present the awards along with ISBDC State Director Jeff Heinzmann, and various state legislators showed up to congratulate the award recipients from their regions.  I had the pleasure of accompanying the Northeast Indiana EDGE Award recipients at the awards ceremony and am proud to have played a small role in helping them achieve their business success.

Blog author Mary Popovich (left) with 2011 EDGE Award recipients
Terry and Lori Berndt (center) and Marsha Wulpi (right),
all from Fort Wayne.

Marsha Wulpi, owner of JAM Impressions in Fort Wayne, won an EDGE Award in the Established Business category.  Her company specializes in direct-to-garment printing, embroidery, and promotional products, and I admire her for her determination and hard work in always looking for an opportunity to expand her clientele and grow her business while providing great customer service.  I also respect her for her extensive community involvement – she is very active as a volunteer with the Chambers of Commerce in Fort Wayne, Leo and Grabill, as well as with her church – and she and her husband Jim have raised a family of four boys to adulthood while running the business.

Terry and Lori Berndt received an EDGE Award in the Emerging Business category for their new company, The Olive Twist, which is located in Covington Plaza.  The new culinary boutique opened last fall to feature an olive oil and balsamic vinegar tasting bar – quite a unique experience for Fort Wayne, Indiana.  Lori, who runs the store, is an amazing and talented lady who serves as a great role model for anyone wanting to start his or her own business.  She worked hard at completing all of the necessary “homework” to get her business up and running.  The result is a beautiful store that has become quite popular with all the local foodies.  I love to see the glow on Lori’s face when she talks about The Olive Twist – she is truly living the American dream!

I congratulate Marsha, Terry and Lori, on their business success, and look forward to continuing our relationship through the Northeast Indiana Small Business Development Center.   

A Family of Overachievers?

The Heck sisters around 20 years ago.

I come from a farm family of five girls who obviously grew up to be women.  I remember as a young girl, when a relative realized that two of my older sisters were valedictorians of their classes, she remarked to a friend, “Oh, they’re just a family of overachievers!”  The way she said it, I thought overachievers must be a bad thing and that there was a stigma attached to being an overachiever.

So, with that memory in mind, I decided for this blog post to explore a bit just what an overachiever is, and to evaluate if my family is in fact one of overachievers.  I decided to look up what other people and resources have said on the subject and to react to their statements as they relate to my family.

“Overachiever:  A student who attained higher standards than the IQ indicated.”  –Definitions.net

I am not sure how to respond to this definition, other than to say it probably does not apply to my family.  Although two of my sisters were valedictorians, I believe they achieved that distinction because of their innate intelligence coupled with their own hard work; to this day they are extremely intelligent and could not have achieved their valedictorian status if their IQs were much lower.  I remember following several years behind my older “smart” sisters in school, and when their old teachers found out I was a Heck (my maiden name), they automatically assumed I was of the same intelligence level as my sisters.  Needless to say, I seldom knew how to answer the difficult questions that were thrown my way in high school, and I am sure I disappointed many of the teachers’ expectations.  For a long time, I thought that because I was not of the same intelligence level as my older sisters (I was mainly a “B” student then), I was not smart.  It was not until my early college days that this myth was dispelled, when I had to take an IQ test for a psychology class and scored above average.  “Wow, I’m not dumb after all!” I thought to myself, and this information gave me the confidence to try harder in college until I was able to learn better and achieve A-grades of my own.

“I became an overachiever to get approval from the world.”  --Madonna

I can relate to this quote from Madonna, only I think the reason many of my sisters became overachievers was not necessarily to get approval from the world, but rather to get the approval of my Dad.  My father set very high standards for all of us sisters.  He expected us to do our best and criticized us if we were any less than best.  My older sisters were given a dollar for every “A” they got on their high school report card, but Dad discontinued this reward system for me and my younger sister because he had to pay out too much money to my two older sisters and didn’t feel like he could afford to reward us in the same way (although neither of us would have cost him as much money for good grades as my older sisters did).  My father always told us to go to college and get an education, and to never rely on a man to take care of us.  Well, I guess that lesson must have made an impression, as we all grew up to be educated, independent women who were not only capable of supporting ourselves, but often had to -- because of being divorced.

“Overachievers don’t think reasonably, sensibly, or rationally.”  -- John Eliot, PhD

I am not sure what the basis was for this comment from Dr. Eliot, but I assume it came from observing family members or acquaintances.  Overall, especially in our professional lives and in our mature adult years, my sisters and I have made decisions that were reasonable, sensible and rational.  However, our personal lives (with the exception of my younger sister) were often a different story.  Four out of five of us could have been the subject of the book, Smart Women, Foolish Choices at some point in our lives.  Possibly as a result of our strained relationship with our perfectionist father whom we were always trying to please, several of us made poor decisions when it came to men.   We often chose men who were unavailable to us in one way or another, men who were overly critical and unappreciative of who we were and what we had to offer, and sometimes men who took advantage of us financially.  The divorce rate in our family is four out of five sisters, with a few of the sisters having been in multiple relationships and marriages over the years.  Another area in which we have struggled is financially (with the one exception named above).   Four out of five of us have had at least one low point financially in our adult lives where were so poor, we were at poverty level.  Although a couple of us experienced poverty as a result of circumstances beyond our control, unfortunately a couple of us became poor because we did not manage money reasonably, sensibly, or rationally.  I am hoping as we settle into our 50s and 60s all of the Heck sisters will figure it all out and become better money managers, or some of us are going to really struggle financially in our retirement years.

“I don’t dwell on whether I am an overachiever.  After my career is over I will sit down and evaluate what I have done.  Until then, all I can do is go out every day and do the best I can.” – Dat Nguyen

I saved this quote for last because I think it represents the stage in life where most of the Heck sisters are currently.  My older sisters are winding down their careers – one as an attorney and college professor; and two as systems analysts, one for a major corporation and one for a major university, respectively.  All of us – including my younger sister, who is a registered nurse and hospital administrator, and even me, who has worked in business marketing and communications most of my life and made the least amount of money – have worked very hard in our careers.  I can honestly say that we have all been overachievers when it comes to our professions, working longer and harder than most of our colleagues, and often achieving more; but we tend not to dwell on it much, as that is how we were raised.  Although the careers of my older sisters are winding down (with one retired and two preparing for retirement), my younger sister and I are still working full time with no retirement in sight.  Until then . . . in fact, until the day I write the last chapter in my book of life, I plan to continue to live by the philosophy that, “all I can do is go out every day and do the best I can;” I can’t see doing it any other way.  And whether that makes me an overachiever is for someone else to decide long after I’m gone.

My "Gift of God"

This post is dedicated to my son Matthew, a name that means “Gift of God.”  Matthew was my first-born and I couldn’t wait for his arrival.  However, things didn’t go so well during my labor – his heartbeat would stop every time I had a contraction -- and when he was born, he was all blue and had to be resuscitated.  They whisked him off to intensive care before I could really comprehend what was happening.  But, after 24 hours of observation, they moved him out of the neonatal ICU and into the regular nursery, and everyone thought he would be OK.

Baby Matthew with Me

Matthew was a colicky and very sleepy baby, but I didn’t think anything of it, because he was my first-born and I didn’t know what to expect.  However, it soon became apparent that he had other problems, too.  He could barely sit up when other babies his age were crawling around.  Although Matt eventually learned to get around by rolling across the floor (it was amazing to watch how fast he could travel by rolling!), he was three years old before he took his first awkward step.  Our pediatrician suggested we take Matt to Riley Hospital for Children, as he was falling farther behind on his developmental milestones.  Riley ran a full array of tests that basically told us nothing, other than the fact that yes, he definitely was “developmentally delayed.”

We were next referred to the Association for Retarded Citizens (ARC) for physical therapy and occupational therapy services.  I was extremely upset that my son was being referred to ARC – I was certain he was just a little slow and would catch up someday.  After all, I came from a family of college graduates; there was no one the least bit slow in my line of ancestry and there’s no way my son was going to be retarded!  At our first case conference, after Matt had been a client of ARC for about six months, they stated that his prognosis was severe mental retardation.  I didn’t like what I was hearing and began to cry.  That was the day I finally began to accept that my son really was different from others his own age.  I was not the least bit happy about it, but I was beginning to believe it and eventually came to accept it.

Matt attended a pre-school program for special-needs children at ARC, and it was there that he took his first steps using a pediatric walker (similar to what senior citizens use, only much smaller).  After two years there, he moved on to the public school system, as was required by his age and the education system.  His school was called Park Hill Learning Center and it was exclusively for children with special needs from the ages of 5 to 18.  Those teachers were saints and I appreciated all of the moral support they gave me, and all the love they showed my son.  He was, after all, a very handsome young boy and a real charmer with his big brown eyes.

Matt During his School Years

After several years at Park Hill, in response to Public Law 94-142, which required all children to be educated in the “least restrictive” environment, Matt and all of his schoolmates were integrated into the public schools within their own neighborhood.  Matt started attending Carroll Middle School, where he began acquiring “normal” friends and where he learned his first curse words from a couple of boys who thought it was “funny” to teach them to him.  Oh, how I wished he was still back at the safe environment of Park Hill!  But he finally settled in and we eventually accepted his new school.  Three significant events happened while Matt was approaching his puberty years at around age 12 or 13:  1) He suddenly started having epileptic seizures, probably a delayed reaction to the brain damage he had suffered at birth; 2) He was found to have several traits of autism, which led the professionals to label him as autistic; and 3) He finally became toilet trained, which was quite an accomplishment for someone with Matt’s limited abilities.

Matt finished his public school years at Carroll High School, where once again he was quite popular with his “normal” classmates and his teachers, and where he loved riding his little yellow bus to and from school.  After “graduating” from high school (which really meant he had aged-out of the school system), he started going to the Adult Day Program of Easter Seals Arc (the new, more politically-correct name for the Association for Retarded Citizens).  This program is a safe haven for adults with moderate to severe disabilities where they work on daily living skills to help them become as independent as possible.  Matt has a lot of friends there, and he can’t wait to go to what he calls “Arc School” Monday through Friday.

Matt made a huge leap into independence in December of 2008, when he moved into an Arc group home.  It was a very difficult decision to make for me and his father, because we have cared for him all of his life.  One of the biggest worries of parents of a disabled child is what will happen to their “child” after they are gone.  These are children living in adult bodies and they cannot live on their own.  Matthew is 30 years old chronologically, but he only functions as a 3-year-old child; he enjoys some of the same toys as a young child and has the innocence and the capacity to love of a little boy.  So with all this in mind, and the realization that we were getting older, we finally decided to let Matt go.

Matt with Santa Claus
"Through the Eyes of a Child"

Matt enjoys living at his group home, which is a beautiful new home in Fort Wayne. He has five roommates – one male and four female – and they all have their own room while sharing a common great room and kitchen.  There is a lot of love in his house and the well-trained staff members take good care of the special residents.  As parents, we are always welcomed, and every weekend we go there to pick up Matt and take him “home” for the weekend.  Matt loves the routine and enjoys the benefits of having two loving families to care for him.

Some of Matt’s favorite activities are watching sports in person and on TV; practicing soccer, baseball and basketball at home; and learning how to play Wii bowling and baseball, which he enjoys doing with both families.  His favorite foods are pizza and cookies and his favorite person is Santa Claus; in fact, Matt says he wants to be Santa Claus when he grows up.  Matt loves his family and has been blessed with a loving family, whom he enjoys talking to on the telephone.  He is very friendly and knows no strangers; when he walks into a room or through a store, he will greet you with a smile and a handshake and tell you to “Have a good day!”  His laugh is contagious while he sees life through the eyes of a perpetual child.  And although he isn’t the child I dreamed of as a young mother, I love him immensely and believe he truly is a “Gift of God.” 



My Air Force Son

I have two amazing sons and will be talking about each of them individually.  Today’s blog is about my son Jonathan, since he sent me a wonderful birthday present today and he is heavy on my mind.

Jonathan is 29 years old and a tech sergeant in the U.S. Air Force.  Obviously I am very proud of him.  He currently is in the middle of a six-month deployment to the Philippines, so I haven’t seen him since last September.  His area of expertise with the Air Force is meteorology, weather forecasting, or whatever you want to call it.  He also has a top-secret military clearance, so all of the things he does for the Air Force may not be entirely weather-related – but since it’s top-secret, I’ll never know for sure.

Family Photos from Recent Christmas Cards

I am proud of Jonathan for a lot of reasons, so where do I begin?  I’ll start with his photography, because the birthday present he sent me today involved family photos from a Hawaiian vacation that we shared last summer.  Jonathan is an accomplished photographer and I am constantly amazed at the many outstanding photographs he has taken. A lot of his photographs can be found on Flicker:  http://www.flickr.com/photos/27562582@N07/ -- go there and take a peek so you can see what I mean.  Although Jonathan is an amateur, many of his photographs have been published pro gratis by nonprofit organizations or publications that have requested his permission, and he also has won photo competitions through DPChallenge (http://www.dpchallenge.com), where he’s known as Jovan.  I like to think I had a part in his photography, having bought him his first camera – a 35 mm – for his high school graduation present in 2000.

Jon & Shana's Wedding Day

Jonathan is married to a beautiful young woman named Shana, and they have two precious little daughters named Lilia (age 5) and Annelise (11 months).  When Jon gets back from the Philippines, they will resume living in Hawaii (Hickam Air Force Base), where they resided the past few years before the deployment.  Other Air Force assignments have taken them to Kaiserslautern, Germany; Biloxi, Mississippi; and Omaha, Nebraska.  Who knows where the next tour of duty will take them?  They are hoping for someplace exotic and I am hoping for someplace not too far away, so I can go visit them without spending a day in an airplane.  Shana and the girls have been staying with her parents in Huntertown while Jon is in the Philippines, so I currently have the unique opportunity to see my granddaughters on a regular basis, which I love – so you can understand why it’s hard when they live far away.

There are lot of other things about Jonathan that make me proud of him, but I won’t go into too much detail so as not to embarrass him.  Suffice it to say that he’s a wonderful young man who loves his family, works hard and has an admirable set of values.  What more could you ask for? 

My Destined Path

Looking back, I think my career path was pre-destined early in life.  I always liked English classes and writing in grade school and was encouraged to write for my school newspaper in eighth grade.  I signed up for a journalism class in high school, and by my senior year became editor of the school newspaper and wrote a column for a local newspaper.  After high school graduation, I worked at the local community newspaper for a couple of summers in between college studies.  I also served as co-editor of The Communicator at IPFW and worked on the staff of the Indiana Daily Student at IU Bloomington while majoring in journalism.  I found journalistic writing to be exciting, rewarding and stimulating.  Each day was different and you were always in on the latest news – plus, you had the opportunity to meet a lot of interesting people.

I got married and dropped out of college, worked at a printing company briefly and became a mother.  I volunteered my services to edit a newsletter for a local nonprofit organization while staying at home to be a full-time mom.  When my baby was 2 years old, I started back to school at IPFW and changed my major to English, since journalism was not available at that time.  After a few years of part-time study, I finally finished my undergraduate degree in 1989 with a B.A. in English and felt so proud of my accomplishment!  I always intended to go back to school someday for a master’s degree, but in the meantime I needed to make a living.  By then, I was a single mom and had bills to pay.

Immediately upon graduating from IPFW in 1989, I accepted a marketing position with a local home builder.  The company was the largest home-building company in northeastern Indiana, and it was a fast-paced position that allowed me to use my creativity in a different way, designing advertisements and handouts to promote the builder’s new homes and developing a newsletter called The Homefront.  I met a lot of people through this position and it was a great start to my professional career.

My Chamber Photo in 2000

After seven years with the home builder, I was offered a position as communications manager with the Greater Fort Wayne Chamber of Commerce.  The pay was better and the position offered more challenges and variety than the previous job.  My main responsibility was creating a monthly publication called Emphasis, which became recognized as one of the top Chamber publications in the country.  I met a lot of the “movers and shakers” in the community (i.e., elected officials, CEOs, etc.) and I could attend all sorts of seminars and events free of charge, which provided opportunities for growth and meeting new people.  It was a “dream job” for me, and over time I was promoted to vice president of communications.  But when I entered my tenth year with the Chamber, things began to change as the economy soured and many of my trusted colleagues either moved on or were downsized.  More and more responsibilities were added to my job description, which required me to work a lot of evenings and weekends, and others’ expectations of what I should be doing seemed to change weekly.  I came to feel burned out, stressed out and tired, as well as drained of all creative energy.

Imagine speeding down a highway, trying to get where you’re going as quickly and safely as possible, and you suddenly come to a roadblock.  Your only options are to turn around and go back the way you came, or to take a side road that leads to places unknown.  When I turned in notice of my intention to leave the Chamber, I had no idea where I was going; I only knew that I needed to move on.  I took the side road, destination unknown.

The departure affected me more than I anticipated, and to be honest, I lost my identity for awhile.  Every time I ran into old acquaintances, they’d ask how things were “down at the Chamber” and I had to explain to them that I was no longer there.  It was hard for them – and me – to understand what had happened.

As it turned out, I went directly from working at the Chamber to a part-time position with the Northeast Indiana Small Business Development Center, a nonprofit organization hosted by IPFW.  I thought the part-time hours would give me a chance to rest up and I would still have the opportunity to use my creative talents to effect positive change, which is one of my missions in life.  After three years, I am still with the SBDC, as it is called, where I specialize in marketing – public relations, business writing and a variety of other creative tasks – all related to promoting the center and helping its clients.  My responsibilities have grown at the SBDC to include business advising, and I have also formed my own sole proprietorship company to offer freelance public relations.  I find it rewarding to help entrepreneurs realize their dreams through my work at the SBDC, as well as assisting nonprofit organizations through my home-based PR business.

When my sons grew up and left home, I started thinking more and more about going back to school.  At first, I considered pursuing a MBA degree, which I thought would be good for my career and help me better understand the “other side” of business.  I took a couple of business classes last fall – accounting and economics -- and realized that the MBA program was not the right one for me.  After exploring the various options, I applied to be a part of the Master of Liberal Studies degree program, and am currently enrolled in my first two graduate-level courses while working full time.

I am excited by this new chapter in my life, but also a little nervous about juggling all the different roles and doing them well.  But with a lot of hard work and determination, I’m hoping to pull it all off, learn a lot, and once again feel that rush of achievement when I finish my master’s degree in a couple of years.  I also am hoping this path will continue to be a scenic route full of opportunities to grow and dream, as I never again want to experience that feeling of being on a dead-end highway to nowhere from just a few years ago.